purple fish guts

Monday, August 08, 2005

Not so perfect...

Some people are prejudiced against different races, some against overweight people. I struggle with mistrusting people who have a picked-up and clean house if I happen to drop over unexpectedly. Lots of us clean and pick up when we are expecting company, but I don't relate to people whose houses are always perfect. For some reason I don't trust them.

I have two friends who are also lax housekeepers, and we don't pick up for each other. To me that is a sign of a really good friend. If I ever come to your house, please don't feel like you have to pick up for me. I prefer to be surrounded by your family's papers, toys, etc. It makes me feel that I can be less than perfect and still be accepted.

It's tragic how many of us walk around feeling like we need to project perfection to be accepted, when that so often is what turns people away. I struggle with both sides. I have a hard time communicating weaknesses for fear of rejection, yet I don't trust others until I perceive their weaknesses, or at least their acceptance of mine. I know that is crazy, but I suspect I'm not alone.