purple fish guts

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Warning! Dave Barry humor!

Dave writes about his newfound status as hero to his 3-year-old daughter Sophie.
So my daughter was telling my wife what was going on at preschool, and the big news was that one of my daughter's classmates, Ian, showed everybody that he could put his hand under his arm and make a farting noise. My daughter was deeply impressed by this. So my wife told her: "Daddy can do that." And my daugher, eyes wide, said: "He CAN?" So now I am a hero.

Upon hearing of his talent, I too was impressed. I have never been able to do this, and have been jealous of anyone who can. Then the coolest thing happened. Sean in the comments revealed a unique technique enabling him to armpit fart. I was intrigued and mulled it over and over in my mind until I HAD to try it. IT WORKS! Even I can now armpit fart! Thanks Sean! Maybe I will be my kids' hero too! Here is Sean's method if you too are armpit-fart-challenged.
Ok.. Since nobody asked I will explain how to make awesome fart sounds with a bending straw..Put the short end of the straw in your mouth and the long end through your shirt and into your armpit..Hold your arm close to your body,blow through the straw and voila! Its very discrete and amazingly authentic sounding.